The book "Games People Play" turns 60 this year. It still has a lot to teach us.
KEY POINTS
- Eric Berne developed transactional analysis after becoming disenchanted with Freudian psychoanalysis.
- He intentionally chose terminology to be easily understood by both the average person and professionals.
- Freudian psychoanalysis focuses on intrapsychic conflicts. TA emphasizes intra and interpersonal transactions.
- Key concepts include strokes, ego states, transactions, psychological games, life script, and life position.
It is hard to believe that it has been 60 years since the first publication of Psychiatrist Dr. Eric Berne's Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis. On the book's 40th anniversary, it had sold more than 5 million copies and had been translated into 20 different languages worldwide. Twenty years later, it has sold millions more.
When it was first published in 1964 it spent over 100 weeks on the New York Times best seller list. Games People Play not only resonated with professionals, but it also struck a chord with the general public. This basic handbook on transactional analysis provides a roadmap showing us how and why we interact and communicate with each other. It's time to revisit this approach to understanding human behavior on the 60th anniversary of its publication.
Source: REGENTS of the University of California/Courtesy of UCSF Archives and Special Collections
Eric Berne, Creator of Transactional Analysis
Eric Berne was born May 10, 1910 in Montreal, Quebec, Canada. Like his medical doctor father, he earned his M.D. from McGill University in Montreal.
In 1936, following an internship at Englewood Hospital in New Jersey, he began a psychiatric residency at the Psychiatric Clinic of Yale University School of Medicine. During World War II, he spent three years as a psychiatrist in the Army Medical Corps rising to the rank of Major. He spent the majority of his time in the Army practicing group therapy in the Psychiatric wards.
Following his army service he relocated to Carmel, California. He had a private practice in both Carmel and San Fransisco, held an adjunct position at the VA Hospital in San Fransisco, and was an Assistant Psychiatrist at Mt. Zion Hospital.
After years of being a psychiatrist who practiced Freudian psychiatry, Berne became disenchanted with Freud's approach. He created transactional analysis (TA), a new theory to explain human behavior and interaction. Freudian psychoanalysis focuses on intrapsychic conflicts shaped by past experiences. Transactional analysis emphasizes intra and interpersonal transactions in the here and now.
Eric Berne thought that both psychological and Freudian terminology were too erudite. He intentionally chose terminology for his new theory to be easily understood and accessible to both the average person and professionals.
Therapy using transactional analysis is usually practiced in a group setting. TA concepts have also been useful when applied to interpersonal relationships, personal growth issues, and in business settings.
Key Concepts of Transactional Analysis
Strokes. A stroke is any unit of recognition. Strokes are what allow people to grow and thrive. Strokes can be positive or negative. Positive strokes are good for us. Negative strokes are bad. Understanding healthy and unhealthy stroking patterns is key to helping individuals grow and develop.
Ego States. From his observations conducting group therapy, Berne recognized that people communicated from and responded to each other from what he called "ego states." He identified three specific ego states; the Parent, Adult, and Child ego states. Each ego state is made up of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
The Basics
Parent ego state. Copies what you think, feel, and behave from your parental figures; sometimes called the learned ways of the world. It includes parent tapes. The parent ego state can be critical as well as supportive. Example: "You shouldn't do that!" "Look both ways before you cross the street."
Adult ego state. It is our thinking and problem-solving part. The adult ego state takes in data and analyzes things. Thinking and acting in the here and now. Example: "What time is it?" "How many feet are in a mile?" "How many states are there?"
Child ego state. It is our playful fun-loving part. The child ego state contains feelings like joy and sadness, sexuality, and curiosity. You are thinking, feeling, and behaving as you did when you were a child. Example: "Wow, that's beautiful!" "I just want to cry." "I hate you!”
Transactions. A transaction occurs between people. It is how we speak, communicate, and respond to others. Most transactions are verbal ones, but they also can be nonverbal. Berne identified three types of transactions: complementary, crossed, and ulterior.
Complementary transactions. A complementary (also called parallel) transaction occurs when an individual sends a message from an ego state and gets a response from the ego state being addressed. For example, Person A asks, "What time is it?" and Person B responds, "It is 1 p.m." This is a complementary/parallel adult-to-adult ego state transaction. The ego state that is addressed is the one that responds.
Crossed transactions. A crossed transaction occurs when an individual sends a message from an ego state but gets a response from an unexpected ego state. For example, Person A asks, "What time is it?" and Person B responds, "There's a clock on the wall, look for yourself!" The message was sent from Person A's adult ego state to Person B's adult ego state, but instead of responding from the adult, Person B responded from the unexpected child ego state, resulting in a crossed transaction. Crossed transactions can cause misunderstandings and conflict.
Ulterior transactions. An ulterior transaction occurs when an individual sends an overt message and a hidden or underlying message simultaneously. The overt message is spoken but the covert message is the true message being communicated. For example, at the end of a first date Person A asks, "Would you like to come up to my apartment for a nightcap? It is cozy and warm up there." (Come upstairs and have sex with me.) Person B responds, "Oh yes, I would love to!" (Let's do it!). Most often the overt message is communicated from the adult ego state of Person A to the adult ego state of Person B, while the covert message is communicated from the parent to child or child to parent.
Psychological games. A game is a series of interactions between two or more people that follow a predictable pattern. The interactions can be words, body language, facial expressions, etc. These interactions lead to a well-defined, predictable outcome in which one individual obtains a "payoff" or "goal." Most participants are unaware they are playing a game. The payoff in most games is the exchange of negative strokes. A few of the common games people play are:
- If It Weren't For You.
- Now I've Got You.
- See What You Made Me Do.
- Look How Hard I've Tried.
- Ain't It Awful.
- Why Don't You—Yes But.
- Let's You and Him Fight.
Life script. One's life script is unconsciously chosen in the early years of our life. A script can be thought of as an unconscious life plan. A life script is the foundation for one's view of the world. Our script undergirds how we see ourselves, others, the world as a whole, and how we fit into it. Life script helps explain people's most important decisions. In general, there are three life scripts: (1) a winner script, (2) a tragic loser script, and (3) a banal script (a non-winning script).
Life positions. I'm OK, You're OK, sometimes referred to as the "OK Corral." One's life position is decided at a very early age. It is a result of one's experience in the world. The strokes one receives from parents, teachers, siblings, other children, and other adult caregivers influence one's life position. We make a decision about ourselves, about our world, and about our relationship with others. We choose a life position. There are four life positions: (1) I'm OK, You're OK, (2) I'm OK, You're not OK, (3) I'm not OK, You're OK and, (4) I'm not OK, You're not OK.
Practice Aloha. Do all things with love, grace, and gratitude.
© 2025 David J. Bredehoft
References
1. Berne, E. (1957). Ego states in psychotherapy. American journal of psychotherapy, 11 (2), 293-309.
2. Berne, E. (1958). Transactional analysis: A new and effective method of group therapy. American Journal of Psychotherapy, 12 (4), 735-743.
3. Berne, E. (1961). Transactional analysis in psychotherapy. New York, NY. Grove Press, Inc.
4. Berne, E. (1964). Games people play: The basic handbook of transactional analysis. New York, NY. Grove Press, Inc.
5. International Transactional Analysis Association. (N.D.). Key concepts in transactional analysis. Retrieved on 1.17.24 from: https://www.itaaworld.org/key-concepts-transactional-analysis